“Authenticity” certainly gets thrown around a lot these days. Authentic leadership, authentic happiness and the list goes on.
But, what does it mean?
I like this definition:
Authenticity is to be, true to one’s own personality, spirit, or character.
But how do you do that?
Do you wake up one day and say, “I’m going to be more authentic”?
Well, maybe that’s a start but actually getting there is a little more complex.
Authenticity comes from self-awareness, honesty and intention.
Let’s break it down.
SELF-AWARENESS
In order to be true to your personality, spirit or character, wouldn’t the first step be to truly KNOW your personality, spirit and/or character?
It’s about understanding your own needs, desires, failings, habits, and everything else that makes you tick. Understanding helps to guide your choices to help you live more in line with what you truly want for yourself.
The more you know yourself, the better you’ll understand why you do the things you do.
HONESTY
Understanding and awareness is one thing but that awareness has to be packaged with a willingness to be honest with yourself.
It means using what you know about yourself to make decisions and choices throughout your day.
For example, I am naturally collaborative and consensus oriented and I don’t like conflict. Growing up I’d bulldoze ahead and argue my point at every opportunity. Of course this would lead to conflict which I didn’t like. So, then I’d cower away with my tail between my legs. I learned that I’m way better at facing a difficult situation by listening to the other person and offering a win-win outcome.
This shift may sound easy, but it took being honest with myself to pull myself out of a pattern that simply wasn’t working for me and replacing it with one that used my strengths.
At some point you have to realize your can’t be all things to all people and situations – being honest with yourself and what works for you makes authenticity much easier.
INTENTION
Where does intention come into this?
So far you’ve learned why you need to know yourself and how being honest with yourself enables you to effectively manage your life.
Intention, then, is the commitment you bring to carrying out the action that aligns with your self-awareness and honesty with yourself.
I learned that my value and strength in working and developing others wasn’t compatible with the competitive culture of the organization I used to work for. I purposefully committed to learning to be a coach to share my strength in supporting others. It took a lot of self-reflection, being truthful to myself , and the deliberate commitment to wholeheartedly follow through.
Intention can also be a commitment to changing a part of your life that no longer serves you. This means stepping up to create a new way of doing things based on who you know yourself to be. For example, order and tidiness may be your preference, but if your office is always in chaos it leaves you stressed and unable to focus. You know you prefer neatness so you set an intention to make a daily ritual of tidying your desk before you end your workday.
The key is that when you’re intentional, you’re more likely to follow through on your new behaviour.
Now let’s put self-awareness, honesty and intention together:
- Self-awareness is knowing your traits, strengths and gaps and how you show up to others
- Honesty is being real with yourself about your self-awareness and accepting who you are
- Intention is being purposeful in how you take your self-knowledge and apply it in your life.
If you want to live an authentic life and show up as genuine to others, it means doing your personal work on all three of the above.
Authenticity is about integrity and truth. It’s about knowing yourself, putting you in control of your life and your path.
What will you do to embrace your truth and bring more authenticity to your life?